feelen betta!

Ok, Now I'm feelen bit betta after what u said Cara. I will just let it flow and try and go with the mood like u said. Not too much tong or slobber. But a little more advice wouldn't have gone astray. Thanks heaps for the advice though. I suppose I'm gana have 2 figure it out 4 myself.Well, last night I was talking 2 one of my guy friends on msn (Jamie), who by the way is my ex-crush. U know, the guy I had a crush on 4 like the past 2 years. Anyways, totally over him by the way! Hes great, but just not 4 me. Mark is the one 4 me. Anyway, talking 2 Jamie and he said not 2 tell Mark that I'm not that experienced.He said to just let it happen naturally and I will get the hang of it. He also said when he first went 2 kiss his girlfriend she turned her cheek as well. So I'm not feelen like such a nob anymore. Anyway, Mark and I r spending New Years eve 2gether. He told his work he needed the night off, and I am so excited bout New Years. Not sure what we gana do yet, but I already brought myself a whole entire outfit. I spent $200 on a dress, shoes, bag, and like this over-dress thing made of lace. Looks really pretty. Can't wait 2 wear it. I can't really afford 2 b blowing money wit uni starting back soon, but I thought it was worth it. I am just so over the moon. He makes me so happy. And another huge thing that I'm not sure if I have mentioned is that I git into UQ to do a degree in secondary education. The degree goes 4 18months (as it is a graduate program and also runs through summer semester). So in 18months I am going 2 b a fully qualified Film and Television and English High School Teacher. Only thing is that I start uni on the 21st of january. All I have 2 do is tuff it out 4 18months! Well that's what I keep telling myself. Well, 4 the first time in my life things seem 2 b going my way. I hope it lasts. Anyways, love u all and miss u heaps. Have 2 c u all some day. At least we have lj 2 kinda keep in contact. talk later:-)

And by the way.............................

Oh yeah, by the way, if I'm having problems with kissing him, how in the hell am I going to go with making out? Isn't there a place u can go to where they teach you how to kiss? What am I going to do? There is only so long he is going to wait to full on kiss me. Surely I could tell him the truth? Oh..... I am so sad. 20 years old and worried I don't know how to kiss. Crap! Well, I hope u all have a good laugh at me. I am so imbarrased. Well, will let u know how things progress. All I have to do is get the hang of kissing! Then it will be great!

Happy Little Vegemite! or not?

Ok, so as u probably already know I have a boyfriend now (who is fantastic by the way). But the thing is we have been out 5 times now and I have not properly kissed him yet. Well we did, but heres how it went: Mark had the flew the first 2 weeks we were seeing each other, so we didn't kiss, then when he finally got rid of the flew and we went to dinner tuesday night, we went up to mount Tamborine after dinner to look down at the lights and up at the stars, from the top of the mountain. Now it was all dark and the stars were out (some clouds). He was holding me in his arms and we were close. I was waiting for him to kiss me and I think he knew I was a little apprehensive (only because I have never kissed anyone on the lips before). I was worried I would stuff it up and kiss really mong. Well, anyway, he came close to my face and I really wanted to kiss him, but I kinda turned my cheek. Then he kissed me on the cheek. We stayed there in each others arms and then again, he leaned close. We pecked on the lips then I turned again. He said it's ok, I don't want to rush you into anything. I said, "no, I just don't want to be bad at anything". Then we kept on hugging and being in each others arms, and then I kinda put my face closer to his and we kinda kissed like 5 times, but I don't really know if it was propper kissing. It was like kissing someone on the cheek, only we were kissing/pecking a few times on the lips. Then I turned my cheek again. So I am so confused cos, it felt like I was mong at kissing. His lips felt nice and it felt like he was doing a good job, but I was so mong. And I don't really know if I was doing it right. This is so bad that at 20, I don't know how to kiss, but I have no idea what I'm doing. Even with all the advice Sabrina has been giving me, I still feel mong. The real question is, do I tell him the truth, that the reason I'm not kissing is not cos I don't want to (because I really really wanna kiss him heaps, all the time), but because I'm not sure how to or if I'm doing it right? Should I tell him? I feel so bad! I think I'm in love with him already, but I can't even kiss him cos I'm scared I'll do it wrong. It really felt like I kissed him mong. I don't know, help! I am so happy because he is so wonderful, charming, cute, smart and funny, and everything I want in a guy, but I'm really sad about me not being able to kiss him properly. It's not cos I'm friget, but more cos I'm scared he will think I'm crap and can't kiss. Help me please!

Stop the Press!

I have the news of the century! I have been going out with this really great guy named Mark and he kinda asked me to be his girlfriend. I am so happy, because he makes me feel happy. He is so wonderful to me. I actualy have to get off the computer now, but will make a long post later on, telling u everything. All I can say is that I am simply extatic. I really really like him so much, and the best part is I think he likes me too! gotta fly...............

Fucken Assignments!

Well as usual I've left my frigen assignments til last. Just handed one in that's due in tomorrow and have one more to start now and that ones due tomorrow. Good bloudy lick to me. Well, I suppose I'll just bullshit it! Oh, Tamara, thanks heaps 4 giving me the number for that lady. After all that, I couldn't get hold of her, but my teacher said I only need one interview and I got one of some guy. Ta heaps though darl! Well I am really going 2 get serious bout this livejournal updating. Nearly finished uni and my degree! Hip Hip Hurray! I am however applying to do a Bachelor of Education Secondary. It only goes for 2 years, so I'll have two degrees in 5 years. Not bad I suppose. Fingers crossed I get in. I am having some serious doubts about being accepted. If I don't get in I am seriously screwed beyond belief.Heres to hoping my luck holds out. And PLEASE nobody tell me it will be fine and I will get in cos u may jinx me. Not that I'm seriously supersticious, but I am so panicking right now. Fingers crossed xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxAnd I'm gana change da subject right now! Like my asshole sister who I seriously wanna punch in da face right now. Did I mention she was a big mouthed nob head who has no brain and has no life, so she annoys da fuck out of me! I am so pissed that I'm related to dat shit! Arrrgh!Change da sub again. So Tamara, Happy now? I heard bout your little post bout bugging me to update! No, seriously, I know I am probably like the worst livejournal member ever. I will make an attempt ta update more often. Gotta let my friends know i'm alive I suppose. Gotta go, my sister is fucking pissing me off. Gotta do my assignment now! lol